So it's the holy month of Muharram these days and we have what we call 'azadari' every night for the martyrs of famous event in Islamic history, Karbala. But that's not what I'd be writing about, it's what I felt and talked to myself about as I was walking home. Just to get it out of the way, the past two months haven't been great for me at all. So I'm in deep stress and all my thoughts are dismay. So when I was walking home, I asked Safar, my friend, that how meaningless life seems sometimes when we're only alive. He replied, "We are all dead inside, yet appear to be alive on the outside." He also quotes Imam Ali a.s, "If everyday you do the same thing and do no good to human race or to yourself, you're considered dead." That's not exactly how it was said but it's what was meant by it. So I thought am I considered death as well? So a flash of my daily routine crossed my mind and I saw that I'm pretty dead at first sight but then I saw that I do things differently than yesterday, at least some of the things. I see new posts on fb and learn from them something new everyday and I read the novel more and more everyday, Adultery by Paulo for sake of mentioning, and I think new things, I have new ideas, I start doing new things. Just last night I was going through youtube, which I do a lot, and the reaction videos to Civil War's trailer where Spider man is first revealed got a this new idea of watching all the top movies of this year once again and that'll help me make my list more judgedly at the end of the year... see I've got plans for early 2017 as well, posting all the things about 2016, tho it doesn't sound anything important but it's still a plan I'm really excited about it. Anyways, not to wander off from the topic which we were taught time and again for essay writing, I'd continue what other idea I got last night just to prove to myself that my days aren't really the same and that I'm not considered dead. So the second thought was to start blogging which I'm doing right now. But where this idea came from? I know that idea doesn't come all of a sudden. Thanks to the pretty miss Huma, who once suggested me to start blogging and she herself was doing it for quite a time then... so yeah she was my early inspiration. Let me add sth about her because I know she's not going to read my blog,... she's soooo pretty! She's like my crush Selena Gomez. Ok let me say it bluntly, she is my crush. Not a crush that I'd like to go around and get the attention and the get into a relationship with her, tho I'd love to, but a crush that I hide deep inside. And she's elder than me. Okay okay, after the early inspiration and that ignition for starting a blog, I saw this trailer of a movie that I wanted to watch called 'Ask me anything' and there the main actress actually runs her blog, a very followed blog tho she herself is a total loser by the looks of it. So that made the picture of blogging more fun to me, and that's all I needed to start one. And I did. So my yesterday was sth else, but today, I did make my blog and now I'm writing and I intend to write regularly for long, and I also proceeded my novel which is being more interesting. So finally, have I made my point that I'm not considered dead? Funny I try to prove it, because the ultimate solution to my bizarre situation, I think, is real death. Anyways, as we'd talk, you'd come to know more about my life... or I'd get to read my life thru my verbalisation of myself haha... because no one's gonna read, right? Uh, enough of negativity already. Someone would read... because soulmates eventually meet because they've the same hiding place!