I don’t see him anymore. Last I saw him was in a photo he
sent me on my WhatsApp account; he was smiling and was wearing a tracksuit by
which I will be assuming he was attending some sport event since he told me he
usually did commentary for sports matches.
For his strong diction though, commentary really suited his tongue. I am
talking about a man who I approached one day after daily noticing him read “the
bastard of Istanbul” by Elif Shafak when I visited the park. He used to wander
around the park, changing places, sometimes walking, and constantly having the
book open in his hands and some very visible bookmarks which I later came know
were his draft papers of his ‘ thought-provoking questions’. I jogged and saw
him moving within the park, and then the next round around and he was still
reading, though at a different place. The specifically blue cover of the book
and, after some closer examination, the font on the cover of the book made me
believe that the book he was reading was about the bastard of Istanbul by Elif
Shafak. I loved this book, it was raw, brave, colorful, contrasted cultures but
the review I gave at the end of the book was somewhat the opposite; I wrote in
the praise-line “… narratively disappointing” which was justified to the awful
ending it has, but I should have been a little kinder. Anyways, he was reading
something really fascinating.
You might be wondering why am I talking about him or why did
I so minutely notice what he was reading? Well, the answer to the second
question is that, I didn’t. When there’s only one other person who reads in the
whole park other than you, it takes no effort to notice actually; plus I am
very fond with the covers of the books so I really remember how a book looked
like. The answer to the first question though is what I am here to write about. It was Saturday and I had taken my two rounds
of the jogging track and was moving to get my bag and start my reading session
when I saw this man sitting on the bench and reading, you know by now, Elif
Shafak. The weather that day was fluffily overcast, one where you know it will
rain, but not sure jus
t when will the clouds pour. Having said that, the day was beautiful;
the song ‘Thunder’ by Imagine Dragons really complemented the day’s weather
where lightening were to strike and thunders were to shout. But by then, it was
quiet, it was busy and it was smooth. And I though why not approach this man
today and have a little chit chat; it’s not something I usually, I’m a shy
person by default but he was older and I knew there’ll be a nice conversation.
So I walked towards him, handshakes and then I sat – the next thing I realize
is that we’re having a real good chit chat. And it was during those thought-provoking
and brainstorming session of ours that I decided to write about it, to enclose
the fragments of wisdom that I received talking with this man. And today, after
probably a month, I am here writing about it. Overdue, yes, but let’s hope we
haven’t shaded any of those knowledge.
·
From a word to a concept.
The first solid knowledge he gave me, after the general
talks were out of the way, was how construction of ideas and words happen
through our perception about things. I came to know that our perception goes
quite deeper than our ideologies about bigger pictures, you know, society, any
individual, failure or success; it goes
to a degree where our perception defines and gives meaning to a single word.
His way around it was to make a person use a specific word in his sentence,
which he would to his best understanding of the word, and from then he’ll go on
defining that sentence and then that paragraph – and so on. Though the idea
would grow larger and wider as we move on with the explanations and thoughts,
but it’ll all be constructed on the image of the that specific word in your
mind. Let’s try on here: beauty. ‘Selena Gomez is the world’ most beautiful
person for me’. Why is she so? ‘Because she has that perfect round, smooth nose
that highly complements his round face, while all the other facial and body
parts combine seamlessly to a make a gorgeous human being’. And from here on
I’d go on in further details about how she caught my eye and how she has turned
into a admiration for me. But I could have thought many things that would
relate to the word beautiful: nature, mom, poetry, philosophy, but I came first
to my mind is what’s important and definitive. And it could be any word, any
word at all, and you would have an image, an idea about that word implemented
in your mind that relates that word to someone, something or any event – and
thus it wholes to make a perception. Softer, more sensible relations to words
would as a whole make a softer image about your personality; while a rigid,
rough relationship would go accordingly to define the person you are. At the
end of the day, it’s really amazing to see that our perception and thoughts
about thing around us really go to deeper level than the general
assumptions.
·
Words are neutral.
This concept goes parallel with the previous one that
explains how words, on their own, are neutral, having no meaning, or let’s say
emotions attached to them. Notwithstanding, words might mean something to us by
the way they have been used or taught, but what ties emotions to them and gives
them foundation and the place to hold your thoughts and ideas, is your own
experiences. Throughout your life, many things happen to you, from daily stuff,
casual things to somewhat bigger, more impactful things – and all these add up
to give your life meaning and drama. Now when you sit to explain or say or
write about the experiences, you pick these tools, the words to accurately
convey your life events to others and that’s where words get their real
meaning. Thus, it’s safe to say that meaning to words are relative, though also
not. Pain might mean for someone a heartbreak, and for some a loss of a close
person, and whenever they hear the word pain, the relate it to that particular
situation. You see, words are but a closed, colored window to a replete room
which only showcases what might lay within those walls – peak in and you’ll see
what really lies within/beyond those words; it’s how we make words our own, our
conveyer, our savior.
·
Oily Ideas.
It was one of the many new and exact-on-the-spot words he
had sued since we were talking. This one stuck out to me because it named a
frustration I have felt throughout. Although he didn’t elaborate that much on
this particular word, I would like to. What is means is that the ideas we so commonly
share, of which many could be of high importance, are ungraspable. Why? Two
reasons: one, we fail to effectively readout our ideas to others; what I mean
to say is that we only talk about the bigger picture, the generalized version
of our advice, and forget to mention the small things that makes the bigger
pictures. You see, all our actions, habits, thoughts, they are made of many
small pieces that we can only see once we are self-conscious and
self/action-aware. Unless we know those little puzzle pieces, our bigger
picture is nothing but blurry, and therefore, ineffective to the audience – a
waste after all, right? Therefore we must give them small tips, little advices,
small tasks for them to cling on to and follow, and in the process making their
own little routines to help them out; only then could we effectively help them
and do the proper sharing of knowledge and ideas. Second, the audience. Let me
say right away, if the audience you’re helping is not interested in what you’re
saying, or is pretending to be, tap out – don’t waste your time on them. It has
happened with me so many times that I have let out hours of speech and endless
gems of wisdom, and the instant we are out of the discussion, they are lost,
put down and even worse, not even picked up in the first place. Know your
audience and the speak, or better, don’t even talk you wisdom, write them!